Will I really feel better if I…
Change jobs, have more time, work less, get promoted, work from home, make more money, move closer to family, split more chores with my husband or make time for myself?
The answer is NO! Here is why…
When you ask these kinds of questions, it’s called the grass is always greener syndrome.
This is when your brain thinks an external change will make an internal problem better. But, of course, it doesn’t.
My client Sara is a classic example of this, she job hopped for 5 years looking for something else that might be "a better fit" when the real issue was, she felt a lack of purpose.
Other moms might go down to part-time to try and "keep up" with life when the real issue is they have no clue what is most important to them and so they keep adding more instead of editing out.
Others might even step down from their managerial role (pullback in their career) to lessen the stress when the issue is they lack confidence and are constantly questioning if they are any good.
As my client Sara learned, an external solution (like a job change) will never solve an internal problem.
Because it isn’t the job that’s the problem. It isn’t the hours worked or how stressful the job may be.
It’s a lack of clarity and belief in self.
Over the past 4 months, Sara and I have dug down deep to define what is most important to her. She named her values, got clear on what truly motivates her, and defined her purpose.
This clarity got her brain thinking about what she is really good at, what she likes, and ultimately what she truly wants.
She’d been job-hopping about every 6 months trying to feel better about herself and because of this internal work, she now knows what she is searching for. This time around, the job search feels clear and focused.
Just yesterday Sara turned away an easy, well-paid, work from home job because it didn’t fit her purpose. This job would have been a no-brainer to her old self, but if she took it, she would still feel just as dissatisfied and out of balance. She can see that now. She knows what she wants, and this job doesn’t align.
It’s hard to make decisions that feel "right" if you don’t have something internally guiding you.
As Sara defined herself and put words to things that felt so innate within her, she naturally built a compass to help her make decisions. This is guiding her job search AND her day-to-day life.
She is starting to prioritize more "me-time", she’s going to bed earlier in order to work-out in the mornings, she’s saying no to people that are not the priority, she’s leaving work at work and feeling more present with her family.
But more than anything she just feels better about herself. She is showing up as a better version of herself and feels more confident and calm.
This is the work I do with my clients. I help them create an internal compass so they feel clear and confident about themselves and their decisions.
Click here to start developing your own internal compass in a free breakthrough call.
