Sometimes the most surprising things can get us out of the spiral of negativity that plagues working moms.
Today, it was a conversation with my five year old daughter as we sat coloring together.
Daughter: Can you draw Elsa?
Me: (hesitate) I'm not that good at drawing Elsa.
Daughter: Well you have to keep trying, that's how you get better.
Me: Yes, this is very true.
(pause)
Daughter: What ARE you good at?
Me: (smile) Singing
Daughter: Good! What else?
Me: Being your mom.
Daughter: Yep. What else?
Me: Cooking
Daughter: Yep. What else?
Me: (beginning to tear up) Being a good friend
And it went on and on. She, always prompting more and encouraging me along the way.
This moment felt very special. Almost like a gift from above.
How often we forget our awesomeness. We spend a lot of time building up our kids, telling them how amazing they are, appreciating them…but we don't spend ANY time appreciating our self.
That is what this moment was all about.
Appreciation.
Without even knowing it, my daughter was reminding me of my value. My natural "goodness". She was prompting me to focus on the positive parts of me, instead of getting bogged down in the things I need to work on (in this case, learning how to draw Elsa).
Appreciation is all about zooming out and taking in a wider perspective of the moment.
It’s focusing on the big picture. Seeing your path up until now and glimpsing down the path to come.
Appreciation can change a negative feeling instantaneously. I have seen it happen time and time again.
For example, later this morning, as my daughter was tantruming about getting dressed, I stopped and appreciated the fact that my 5-year still needs me and that I get to help her through these moment. It changed everything.
Instead of being annoyed. I was sympathetic.
Instead of yelling. I spoke with confidence and ease.
Appreciation reminds you of things you already know, but have momentarily forgotten.
Here is what I was reminded of today, because of my daughter's promptings:
I am a good mom.
I'm a really good wife.
I'm an amazing friend.
I'm a fabulous cook, musician, confidant, frisbee player, daughter, organizer….
And...I am an awesome life coach for moms.
I know these things. It’s not hard to rattle them off.
And my guess is you can easily rattle off a list of what makes you good too.
Take a moment to do that, right now, and see what happens.
It will completely transform this moment. And this moment is the only moment that matters.
