Self-validation is the difference between making strong, decisive, decisions without the need for others’ approval… or not.
When you are constantly seeking validation from your boss, friends, or husband to tell you when and how to do something then it’s easy to lack confidence.
Am I doing it right?
Is this the best way to handle potty training?
Maybe I just need to research a bit more.
These questions seem innocent, but they put control in the hands of someone else.
Someone that needs another to validate the little choices in life, often needs someone to validate them as a person as well.
They need to hear they are doing a good job.
They need their husband to go "all-out" on Mother’s Day.
They are often perfectionists that spend too much time getting things "right".
Self-validation is the tool for feeling confident and in control of life.
Validating yourself looks like...
When your brain asks, am I doing this right? You answer the question for yourself and evaluate if you are, in fact, doing it right.
When your brain asks, is this the best way to handle potty training? You answer the question and evaluate if it is the way YOU want to handle potty training.
When your brain suggests, more research will help you find the right answer, you make a decision based on what you know and don’t question it.
Self-validation is asking your own brain to answer questions and never waiting or asking someone else to answer for you.
This builds confidence and self-trust.
When you believe in yourself at that level, you never over-work because you have nothing to prove to anyone.
You are more present when you are spending time with your family because you aren’t concerned about what others think.
You go after a big promotion simply because you want to, not because someone else told you that you’d be a good fit.
Self-validation is true freedom.
It’s the "have it all" kind of life.
